I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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