mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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