I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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