Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
