I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
