Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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