pedialite and red bull = repair kit
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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