The maid of honor just puked.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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