What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
