i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize