But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
