the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
