make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
