You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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