The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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