I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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