too bad you live with your parents still
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
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