I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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