Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
