Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
