I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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