I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
