Need sex. Gaining weight.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
