Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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