Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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