You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
