How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
