Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.

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  (214): I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day. http://tfl.nu/pcf7
  Replies (26) Good night (5362) Bad night (618)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  NEVER shave your cleavage hair.

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  (804): NEVER shave your cleavage hair. http://tfl.nu/pogh
  Replies (87) Good night (669) Bad night (9637)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.

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  (931): dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud. http://tfl.nu/azxi
  Replies (20) Good night (5639) Bad night (607)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.

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  (315): It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar. http://tfl.nu/d08o
  Replies (26) Good night (4089) Bad night (950)
• Favorite

  (234): View more from Ohio

  omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic

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  (234): omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic http://tfl.nu/8g4p
  Replies (12) Good night (6370) Bad night (910)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.

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  (304): yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at. http://tfl.nu/ro5c
  Replies (12) Good night (6109) Bad night (1267)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?

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  (617): so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic? http://tfl.nu/c421
  Replies (60) Good night (1371) Bad night (6914)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.

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  (727): My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out. http://tfl.nu/gjqc
  Replies (5) Good night (8369) Bad night (918)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.

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  (618): This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money. http://tfl.nu/bov0
  Replies (3) Good night (2200) Bad night (694)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think

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  (401): in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think http://tfl.nu/ydqs
  Replies (17) Good night (951) Bad night (2219)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.

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  (971): I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney. http://tfl.nu/myp2
  Replies (22) Good night (2145) Bad night (759)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.

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  (406): Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip. http://tfl.nu/5qjy
  Replies (6) Good night (968) Bad night (474)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.

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  (773): Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh. http://tfl.nu/c68d
  Replies (0) Good night (775) Bad night (418)
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon

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  (559): I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon http://tfl.nu/fvut
  Replies (0) Good night (452) Bad night (588)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.

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  (919): They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am. http://tfl.nu/0bdo
  Replies (0) Good night (542) Bad night (310)

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