thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
