He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
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