Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I forget how to act sober
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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