dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Randomize
