that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize