If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
