Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
