I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
