its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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