My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
