I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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