I'm really into asian looking animals
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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