Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
