is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
