a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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