hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
whose parrot is this?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
