he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
