I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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