dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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