NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
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