Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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