She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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