I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I will pee on everything he values.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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