My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I have tasted many bathrooms
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize