I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
